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Illegal Dumping

Posted by Mark | Filed under Humor, Life

Before din­ner this evening, my wife & I walked down to our local Farmer’s Mar­ket. It was a bit hot­ter out than I’d thought it would be, mak­ing me extra glad we’d brought along bot­tles of iced tea to drink. How­ever upon return­ing home, we were dis­mayed to find our apart­ment to be a scene of some ille­gal dumping.

The Accused: Cap­tain Jack — known aliases “Jack”, “Cap­tain”, “Fuzz Butt”, “Stinky”, “Jacque“
The Crime: Ille­gal dump­ing (e.g. poop­ing on the bath­mat not more than two feet from his lit­ter box).
The Pros­e­cut­ing Attor­ney: Me.
The Judge: Her Hon­or­able Judge Michelle¹

State­ment by the Pro­s­ec­tion: In this apart­ment there are 3 liv­ing beings; myself, my wife and Cap­tain Jack. Two of them were out of the apart­ment at the time of the inci­dent. No ille­gal dump­ing had occured prior to Michelle & I leav­ing for the Farmer’s Mar­ket. The apart­ment was securely locked while we were gone and there were no signs of forced entry.

State­ment by the Accused: *meow*

Ver­dict: Guilty as charged. The accused is to have his nose pointed at, but not quite in, the ille­gal dump­ing to show him what he did wrong. Fur­ther, the accused is to held in soli­tary con­fine­ment for a period of not less than 10 and not more than 30 minutes.

¹ Judge Judy ain’t got nothin’ on my wife! *grin*

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