F’ing Management

Today was a brillant example of why management sucks. I was working merrily along1 testing a particular area of the software. Then I had to teleconference –he said with extreme venom and hatred– into a meeting for a testing project that I’m not currently working on but that I would much, much rather be on. For extra fun, that teleconference –again said with extreme venom and hatred– call was taken at my desk. A desk which I might add is in a cubicle, a private office. A cubicle which happens to be located next to the loudest @#%&@(^&!#($)^*^()#$^#%&^@$(^#$(^#)(%*@&($#^ f’ing support group in our building. They’ve got email; they’ve got phones; they’ve even got IM but when this group wants to communication; they just scream crap out.

Anyways, I took the conference call and listened in watching my clock count away the wasted minutes of my life. When the meeting was finally over; I got back to working on the @#(%@ project that I am currently assigned to. I’d only gotten a few minutes into working when I get a meeting announcement for another meeting today. In fact, just 20 minutes away but the only information that the announcement gives me about the meeting is a subject line of “Test”. WTF?

It’s coming from one of my managers2 and he’s sent out dozens of meeting announcements before without any problems; so why would he be trying to test the system out that way? 20 minutes later, I got the answer.

Apparently, UPPER management decided that everybody in the company is going to have to take this general aptitude test but had told middle/lower management that they weren’t supposed to say anything yet. Then Human Resources started sending out meeting invitations to schedule people for the test. So our managers were pulling an emergency meeting to do spin-control and fight the rumor mill. There was one problem with that plan.

Some of the team I’m on –including me– work out of a different building, in a different state and we’re not scheduled to take this stupid test until next week. As such and as our HR person isn’t a complete f’ing idiot; she didn’t send out the invites yet because she wasn’t supposed to. So the only thing that the emergency meeting occomplished for me was to start freaking me out instead of helping me stay calm. I hadn’t heard a word about this test until I went to this meeting and then I got treated to roughly an hour of how they couldn’t tell us yet because management said they couldn’t and you have to do what management says and they won’t use this as the sole factor of whether or not you keep your job as that would be nuts and I’ll fight against that thing I said they’d never do tooth and nail. Riiiiiiiiiight. Like I’m going to believe you’re going to fight that hard for me when you just got done saying you didn’t already tell us because management said not to and you have to do what they say.

I feel sooooooooooooooo reassured. *sigh*

1 As merrily as I ever get at work, first thing in the morning.
2 Work isn’t quite as bad for me as it was for Peter Gibbons; I’ve only got 2 direct supervisors instead of 4 (or was it 6?).

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